Argument or Discussion?

When does a topic meant as an innocent observation turn into an argument? Why does it not become a simple discussion? Let's look at a recent posting by a friend on Facebook on the topic of the young girl dismissed from a Catholic school because her parents were lesbian (on the surface at least, that was the reason given). As soon as posts were added that were on opposite sides of whether this was right or wrong, the gloves came off and it was war!

Why did this go to an argument, with some fairly harsh and biting words, instead of being a topic ripe for discussion?

My first theory is the fact that it is such an emotionally charged topic...that of gay parents, or gay rights, or what have you. Does the level of emotion associated with a topic affect its ability to be discussed without it turning into an all out fight? In the case of this posting, it would seem so. It was as if neither side wanted to hear the other's reason for their view. It seemed necessary that one side or the other had to be right, and the other wrong. Their view was unimportant.

My other theory is that of the "pot stirrer", or maybe in this case...the "bear poker". We place a topic out there, fully aware that it is going to raise much contention, just to see what happens. Sometimes this is done by people who see a hot topic that they really have no interest in, but they know it will get the ball rolling. Other times it is one they are fully vested in but they are looking for a scrap.

I now fully understand why they say that the two topics that should never be discussed at a party or gathering of some sort are politics and religion. Bring up a topic that touches both and you have the makings of WWIII! Abortion, gay marriage, and God in the schools will start the bullets flying!

It is unfortunate that it has to be this way...or so it would seem. Some of these topics would be so interesting to debate in an organized fashion. Not trying to prove one side or the other right or wrong, but to honestly try to see where the each side is coming from. Maybe that is why so little seems to get done in the Congress. They always have to have it their way only.

I know that I don't always want to hear what the other side has to say, but I hope to get better. I just find it hard to when the other side of the issue gets stuck on stupid and takes it immediately to an argument. Let's meet in the middle and have some adult conversation about those topics that affect us all.