Why Can't We Be Friends?

This isn't my first election season to have gone through in my adult years.  It is, however, the most hostile and divisive I have ever seen.  It has amazed me to see relatives, close friends, even people who hardly know each other, calling each other names, deriding and insulting each other.  The civility of political discourse has been horrible.  Shoot, we are all starting to act like politicians!!!

One particular friend of mine has had quite a number of his "friends" unfriend him on Facebook due to his political views.  Now, the only people on his page seem to have the same political beliefs as he does.  He doesn't like that, of course.  He likes to have the other point of view to an issue.  He will disagree, but always does so in a polite, mature manner.

Personally, I have been viciously attacked with profanity and other insults because of my views.  It seems that this election season, there is no discussion about issues.  It is cut and dry, you either agree with me or we can't be friends, or you are an idiot, etc.  There is no debate between people, only name calling and hostility.  I often wonder if those same people would act in person, the same way they do on Facebook.

My brother and I differ on our political views and which issues are important to us.  I vehemently disagree with him and he tolerates my views and comments.  The other night I asked him one question, "Why do you support the guy you support?"  He said he would answer me if I would promise not to talk politics with him anymore.  He told me, I disagreed...and now I will keep my promise.  The point is, we were able to discuss it, disagree...and still be brothers...be friends.  Too many, it seems, have gone to the extreme.

What I don't understand is how anyone, regardless of party affiliation, can put their support of a candidate ahead of a friendship, familial relationship, etc.  People who six months or so ago, were sitting down having a drink together, now won't even look at each other.  What has happened?  Neither of these candidates is such an awesome person, or deserve such loyalty as to cause people to turn on each other.

In less than a week, we will be past the election.  What then?  What happens to those friendships that were damaged or ended from this nasty process?  Let's hope that decency returns and those friendships and other relationships can be repaired.

Easy to Become Jaded

Today I have been thinking a lot about a lot of things.  It started out with being unfriended and blocked on Facebook by one of my wife's cousins.  I'm really not sure why, but I guess it is because she didn't like me telling her she was drinking the political koolaid.  She told me I was a racist.  When I asked why, I was told it was because black people drink koolaid.  I didn't know that, but I will be sure to tell my boys they are no longer to put down "white" on a demographics question.

Then it was thinking about the upcoming election.  This is the first one, in my memory, that seems to have so much riding on the result.  Maybe it is just because of where I am in my life.  I have different priorities now and I am much more aware of what is happening in the world and how it affects me.  I am genuinely fearful of the result if it doesn't go the way I hope.

I read the pleasant comments and shared things on Facebook and appreciate the lighter side of life and share in people's happiness.  But they are quickly followed up with nasty or rude comments about a story in the news or one of the political candidates.  For some reason, this election seems to have brought out the worst in people.  There is no discussion, only angry exchanges.

I sit and wonder what happened to the decency of the human spirit.  When did it become OK to call a person a racist because he thought a black quarterback in the NFL is a poor leader on the field.  When did it become OK to call a person intolerant just because they don't agree with your point of view.  When did it become OK to harass or ridicule a person because of their religious convictions?

I wonder what happened to our ability to laugh at life and at ourselves.  Today I heard a story of a father who wasn't going to allow his children to watch "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" because of the bullying in the cartoon and how Lucy is so mean to people.  Really?  Remember Archie Bunker and George Jefferson?  Talk about racist, bigoted behavior!!  Now, you can say it was a different time when those shows were on.  But I cry BS!  People laughed at the jokes both ways, because everyone could see how ridiculous Archie looked and it was fun to see a black man be as racist as a white man.  We laughed at the horrible behavior and saw it for what it was...stupid.  Now, we have become so sensitive and politically correct that we don't dare step wrong.

There are still good people out there, it is just getting harder to find them.  A good news story gets put online or on TV and people immediately look for something snarky to say.   We as a society seem to have given up on being nice to people.   Being polite has become too much work.  It is easier to simply be rude to people like they are to us.  The Golden Rule is alive and well...just now quite like it was intended.

Personally, I hope everything settles down a bit after the election.  As for me, I want to look for the positive in people and try not to be so jaded.  It is easy to do but it leaves you with an empty feeling.

So tomorrow, I will take pride in what God has blessed me with in my life and enjoy what He has placed in my life.  I will enjoy the beautiful weather and the changing colors on the trees.  I will see the beauty in people I meet and interact with.

Life is filled with choices.  Our attitude and disposition are affected by our choices.  Right now...I choose not to be jaded.

Be an Informed Voter...and VOTE!!

As we get closer to Election Day, the hype and the accusations and denials all get ratcheted up.  I read an article the other day that made the claim that it appears people are starting to ignore the "fact checkers" because people expect the candidates to skew information, bend numbers, and offer empty promises.

Now, though that may be unfortunately true, but it does not release us from the responsibility to be an informed voter.

I heard a woman on the radio today say that she was shocked that a family member was going to vote Democrat, since most of the family was Republican.  The elderly uncle, who had fought in WWII, told her that his father had always voted Democrat so he was going to as well.  In my opinion, that is just foolish.  Not just because he is voting Democrat, but because he is doing it for a foolish reason.  Let it be noted that I feel the same way regardless of party.  What if the candidate doesn't stand for what the uncle believes in?  Does the uncle even have issues important to him?  A person should never vote for a candidate because he is black/white, by religion, by ethnic background, or simply because he belongs to a particular party.  Like Martin Luther King said, you have to judge a man by the quality of his character, not by anything else.

I have always prided myself on educating myself on the candidate and voting for the person, not the party.  I recently sent in my absentee ballot and voted for a candidate from the opposite party because I knew him personally, knew his character.  I knew what kind of job he will do.

I think it is important that we find the issue or issues most important to each of us and then find out how the candidate stands on those issues.  Is there going to be a perfect candidate...no!  Are we basically picking the lesser of two evils...probably.  But then choose the candidate that best fits your idea of an ideal candidate and vote.  It is totally useless to say, "I don't agree with either one of them so I won't vote".  If you don't vote, you have abdicated your right to complain later on.  Don't disrespect our forefathers who fought for these rights by not exercising them.

At the end of the day...you should be able to look a person in the eye and tell them you voted for candidate X because of A, B, and C.  Hopefully none of those reasons will be for anything other than issues you believe in.  So educate yourself on the candidates by maneuvering through all the BS the media puts out...and VOTE!!

I'm Mark, and I approve this message.

A Mayonaise Jar and 2 Beers

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

 

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.

 

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

 

 

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else..
He asked once more if the jar was full.

 

The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’

 

 

 

 

 

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

 

The students laughed …

 

 

 

 

 

‘Now,’ said the professor as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things—your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions—and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car..
The sand is everything else—the small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Spend time with your children.
Spend time with your parents.
Visit with grandparents.
Take your spouse out to dinner.
Play another 18.
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
Take care of the golf balls first—the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented.
The professor smiled and said, ‘I’m glad you asked.’
The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.

 

 

 

Have a great weekend everyone...go have a beer with a friend!

Proud of My Educated Future Voter!!



The man to the right is Henry Ayers, the owner of the
 dealership where we purchased our cars.

 Yesterday, Selena and I took the two youngest boys and our daughter and headed to the Mitt Romney political rally in Newport News.  The weather was nasty, but we had never been to a political rally and figured this might be the only time we will ever get to one for a Presidential candidate.

So, we packed up the boys and grabbed Anna's backpack and headed to Victory Landing Park.  We were woefully unprepared for the weather, all of us getting soaked to the bone, except Anna.  Unfortunately I didn't get a picture of her, snug as a bug in her covered backpack.

We were interviewed by the local CBS affiliate and ended up on the 11pm news.  I was also interviewed by ABC radio on our way out of the park.

It was a very cool experience, even if dampened by the weather.  Gov. Romney arrived early and cut his comments short due to the nasty weather.  He did not elaborate much on how he was going to accomplish his five points he has come to talk about, but I didn't expect him to.

My 17-year-old son, Daniel, has been having some very spirited debates with me about the Presidential race.  I tease him that he has been drinking the Liberal kool-aid because of the views he has.  But I am very proud of him.  He will never be an uninformed voter.  I may not agree with his views, but he at least has them, and stands by them.

Our debate last night centered on the fact that he claims that Romney has no details in his plan.  Essentially, according to Daniel, this means he has no plan.  I, on the other hand, don't expect a candidate to give me great details in his plan.  I believe that it is too hard to keep promises that are too detailed.  I do not need to know "how" Gov. Romney is going to skin the cat, just tell me which cats are getting skinned.  Give me enough detail to know what it's about, and I am good to go.

Taxes seem to be Daniel's rallying topic, and my least worried about.  But it is a good example of my point.  I do not care which loopholes Romney is going to try to close, just that he is.  I want to allow him the leeway to close whichever ones he can and not be hamstrung to close those he "promised" he would.

I am also proud of Daniel for choosing something that he believes strongly in and educating himself on it.  This is where he and I really differ on the issues that are most important to us.  Where Daniel is most interested in fiscal issues, I am more focused on the social issues.  I worry more about Pro-Life issues, religious freedom and gun ownership issues.  Daniel appears to be more of a fiscally liberal individual and worries less about social issues, especially those that do not affect him directly.

I have a great deal of respect for my sorrowfully misguided son.  He will never vote for a candidate based on skin color, ethnicity, or religion.  And thankfully, because I don't agree with whom he would vote for, he won't be able to vote this year!!!

When My Little Lion Found Her Roar!

This past weekend we went to Washington, DC to visit my older daughter at her university.  We picked her up and took the Metro in to go to the National Zoo.  It is quite a nice zoo, even if a bit on the hilly side. 

As we walked around, my baby girl, Anna, took in everything BUT the animals it seemed.  She looked around, but it was hard to tell if she was really focusing on the animals I was trying to point to.  Was she really seeing the little monkey in the tree, or was she staring blankly into the glass enclosure.  The orangutans and gorillas were a bit easier.  After all, they were right up front and I could easily see her focus on them and smile.

It is challenging to get a one-year-old excited about the zoo.  She just isn't quite "there" yet.  But, when we got to the Great Cat exhibit, she seemed a bit more interested.  I started to point to the lions and do a "rowr" for her.  "Anna", I said, "The mommy lion says 'Rowr'".  After a few times of repeating my "rowr", she gave me a very faint "rowr".  After a few more times, she put a bit more volume in her "rowr" and even got some growing going.

Having young children is such a blessing, but observing them as they learn and pick up on new experiences has got to be the best part of being a parent.  My little Anna Banana is growing up fast and is finding herself.

Look out world, Anna has found her "ROWR"!!